JORDAN'S STORY
Jordan and her mother Jeannie are a red haired
duo. Jeannie, an ER physician, is
all energy: petite, wiry and on the go! When I first met her,
she told me how
sensitive and fiery her little 3-week-old girl was. Here's
how Jeannie described
those challenging first weeks:
"What is it like
to be the mother of colicky baby? I have by no means led a
difficult life, but I am a physician and have gone through
some rough medical
training, where sleep deprivation is the norm. But, nothing
in my experience
has been even close to the mental, physical and emotional
challenge of being
the mother of colicky baby!
My pregnancy, labor and
delivery went fine and the first two weeks of
Jordan's life were relatively easy -- she just ate and slept.
I was wondering
what the big deal was. Then, when she was about 3 weeks old,
she 'woke up'.
Jordan didn't have the
typical 6-9PM bouts of fussiness that I had learned
about in medical school…she had inconsolable crying punctuated
by blood
curdling screams that went on all day. She never slept during
the day, hated
the swing, bouncy seat, and especially the car, so I carried
her all day -
singing, bouncing and pleading with her to stop crying.
One thing that would
sometimes calm her was to go for long walks. But, even
when outside, she would keep screaming for at least half an
hour until she
'realized' she was where she 'wanted' to be! I would put her
in the infant
carrier (she'd never 'consent' to be in the stroller) and
walk around our
neighborhood. I loved getting out with her, but I hated to
run into people
who always seemed to want to heap their unwanted advice on
me. 'Maybe
she's cold?' 'Do you think she's hungry?' As if I were neglecting
my child.
I carefully timed my
visits to 'Mommy and Me' groups so I would be feeding
her during most of the class. But, I have to admit that deep
inside I was
terribly jealous of the mothers whose quiet babies were contentedly
just
sitting in their car seats.
Jordan was super-vigilant.
She noticed everything and easily got wound-up
and over-stimulated. Yet I was confused because the only thing
that even
momentarily soothed her during her rages was very vigorous
stimulation, like
loud sounds or jolting movements.
Believe me, it's tough
holding your baby all day long while she screams right
in your ear. I'd spend hours sitting with her, calming her
in the glider, and
once Jordan was quiet, I was afraid to put her down. I even
put off going to
the bathroom as long as possible for fear of waking the 'sleeping
dragon' and
starting the shrieking all over again.
I initially thought she
had a stomach problem causing excruciating pain, but a
change in my diet and gas drops did nothing. After about 3
weeks of this,
we were 'fried'! So, we asked our Dr. Karp for help."
When Jordan was 5-weeks-old I made a house call to see if
I could help. After just
a few minutes I understood why Jeannie sounded so weary. Jordan
was a little
"pistol" and the only thing that worked to calm
her down was non-stop intensity.
She required jumping not rocking, swirling not
swinging and even the all-powerful
"ride-in-a-car" only worked when her mom hit every
pothole in the street!
(Jeannie began to hate red lights because when the car was
stopped Jordan would
wake up and yell even more!)
I sat down with Jordan and I tightly swaddled
her…she went ballistic! She did calm,
however, when I turned the hair dryer on the loudest setting
and began to jiggle her
very fast. After a few minutes of that, Jordan relaxed and
allowed her eyes to drift
closed but, within seconds of slowing my pace, her ranting
began all over again.
Next, I did fast rocking for about 5 minutes
and when she seemed at peace, I slid
her, fully swaddled, into the swing (opening the wrap between
her legs to make
room for the center protective bar). However, it was soon
evident that even the
swing's fastest speed was too slow for this dynamo. So, I
rocked the swing
manually, in fast little jerks, for 30 seconds before letting
it continue on the fastest
speed with the white noise blasting nearby.
With all this, Jordan finally surrendered into
sleep (or so we thought). Jeannie
and I exchanged smiles; we had "cracked the code"!
We almost started "high
fiving". Her face, formerly twisted into a grimace, now
angelic.
After watching her sleep peacefully for 15 minutes,
I turned the annoying roar of
the hair drier to the low (slightly quieter) speed so that
Jeannie and I could talk for
a moment before I left. Within seconds, Jordan began to clench
her face into that
pained look that usually came exactly 4 seconds before her
giant shriek.
We recognized our naive miscalculation. Jordan
may have been lightly asleep but
she wasn't in the deep "coma-like" slumber we had
hoped for. She clearly was still
aware of the world around her. However, before she had a chance
to scream, I
lunged towards the noisy appliance and switched it back to
the loudest, harshest
speed.
In seconds, the meltdown was averted and Jordan
returned to her peaceful repose.
Over the next ½ hour, Jeannie and I tried several times
to turn the hair dryer
down, but each time, the sleeping (but aware) Jordan detected
the change and we
had to kick the speed up again…to "zone" her
out!
Jeannie continues her recollection:
"Calming her the way I did would
have looked like 'baby torture' to anyone
taking a peek through my kitchen window, but she loved it…and,
I did, too!
Finally, I had a way to put my baby down for 1-2 hours a day
without her
exploding.
Now her daily routine
included a long rest period, twice a day, being
swaddled, swung, surrounded by sound and looking out the window
to the
backyard. My husband, David, made a tape recording of the
shower to
provide the noise she needed and we put the tape player right
in front of
her on the swing tray.
Jordan began to improve
at about 9-10 weeks. She had less frequent
meltdowns and longer quiet times, but she continued to hate
the car, stroller
and bouncy seat. I still used the swing, swaddling and loud
white noise for
naps, or when she was fussy, but now, at 3 months, things
are definitely
better and improving daily."
By 4 months, Jordan hated the swing but still loved loud white
noise and being
wrapped at night. She was much easier for her mother to calm,
but she was so
sensitive she wailed when she was picked up by anyone else.
Jordan no longer took
naps but she slept very well from 10PM-7AM with one quick
feeding at 5AM.
By 7 months, Jordan was napping again but, only
in the swing or rocking chair.
By that time, nighttime swaddling had lost its effectiveness,
but she was able to
sleep through the night, after just 2 days of "sleep
training".
Once Jordan reached the age of 9 months,
she was no longer fussy or difficult, but
she was extraordinarily sensitive and tenacious. She demanded
the right consistency
of food and she rejected all green vegetables unless they
were mixed with fruit.
The first time Jeannie spooned sweet yellow squash into Jordan's
mouth she
screamed like she had been given arsenic. Jordan still loved
sleeping in the fast
swing with ocean sounds from a white noise machine, but by
then Jeannie wisely
placed padding under the swing just in case Jordan wiggled
free and took a tumble.
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